Working Mommy Guest Post at Stafford Stories

Hey friends-- Happy hump day!

(Tangent: have y'all seen this hilarious commercial? Cracks me up every time!)

Today I'm guest posting over at Stafford Stories where Melissa has been hosting a series about a day in the life of working moms. Click here to read about how I juggle life as a wife and mom, along with my career and other day-to-activities. It can be hectic at times, but it's always worth it.

Hope you're having a great week!

A Day in the Life: 8 Months

I decided to document a day in our life so I could remember how we spent our days during this stage in our lives. I can barely remember what I did with Nicholas on a daily basis when he was a newborn, so I'm sure this phase will become a blur at some point in the near future. This particular day (Thursday, September 27th) was a little bit busier than our average day in terms of social plans and activities, but it still gives a good flavor of what we did on a daily basis while I've been staying home with Nicholas.

1:30am: Due to poor time management the prior evening (a not uncommon occurrence), followed by anxiety about going back to work and starting Nicholas in daycare, I have probably been asleep for just 20 minutes when Nicholas starts wailing. I lie there for a few minutes. Nope, doesn't sound like he's going to stop and go back to sleep. I blearily get up, nurse him, change him, and give him some infant Advil. I'm pretty sure he's teething again.

1:48am: I climb back in bed and gratefully fall into a deep sleep. Until....

5:45am: Nicholas starts crying again. Jason rouses me, but I roll over and try to ignore the baby monitor. He quiets down after a few minutes.

6:10am: And he's crying again. I get up to nurse him and change him again.

6:30am: I put Nicholas back in his crib and tell him it's still night time. Too. Early. To. Get. Up. (The light from the kitchen and the sounds of Jason making coffee don't help my case, but I'm hoping he'll buy it.) I crawl back in my bed hoping to get a little more sleep.

7:00am: Nope, he's not buying it. He's been fussing off and on for the past 15 minutes, so I stumble out of bed again, go get him, and bring him back into our bed. Usually, this results in him crawling all over the bed and repeatedly punching me in the face or trying to poke my eyes out, but he is strangely calm and content to just lie next to me in the bed. He listens as Jason shaves and gets ready for work.

7:30am: Jason leaves for work and the house is quiet. Stroke of luck! Nicholas is dozing off in our bed. This probably hasn't happened since he was 5 months old. I seize the moment and try to doze off myself-- while remaining completely still and crouched on the edge of the bed so as not to disturb the little prince lounging in the middle of bed.

8:15am: I am asleep, but as I shift to finally get comfortable, I wake Nicholas. Oh well. All good things must come to an end. When he opens his eyes and realizes he's sleeping in the big bed next to Mommy, his expression is priceless. We play in the bed for a few minutes.

8:20am: Time to face the world. I pour myself a much needed cup of coffee and grab a yogurt. OK, first I have a piece of the brownies I baked yesterday. Then I grab my nonfat yogurt. Nicholas is crawling around the kitchen floor. I try to ignore the fact that it is absolutely filthy and brush away the bigger, choking hazard crumbs with my feet. Full disclosure here, people.

8:30am: I put Nicholas in his Sassy Seat where he bounces happily while I drink my coffee and browse Facebook and a few blogs. I try to limit my time on the computer while he's awake, but need a few minutes to warm up to the world before I can really get into my day. (As you may have already grasped, mornings aren't really my thing.)

9:00am: Time for Nicholas' breakfast! I make him some baby oatmeal cereal, get him strapped into his chair, and feed him while sipping my second cup of coffee. After he finishes his cereal, I share a few bites of my yogurt with him. It's organic and nonfat, but still has added sugar, so it's a rare treat for him. He laps up several big bites.

9:17am: I sign "all done!" and we do "washa washa"-- a silly song I made up to sing when we wash his face and hands after meals. (It bears a very strong resemblance to "brusha brusha," which we sing when I "brush" or wipe clean his teeth before he goes to bed.)

9:20am: Play time! We play on the floor of his room with his Baby Einstein treasure chest. I sneak in a few chores around his room, including emptying his Diaper Genie (ew) and folding some of his laundry. We discover he likes playing inside the laundry basket-- until he starts to pull up on it and it tips almost all the way over. And our time playing in the laundry basket ends as quickly as it started.

9:55am: Nicholas starts to get fussy, so I begin our wind down for his morning nap. I turn off the lights and we read his Dinosaur board book. Then we go to the window and say bye-bye to the tree, the leaves, the grass, the red truck, and the windowsill latch (his favorite item), and finally pull the curtains closed. I nurse him, rock him, and put him in his crib.

10:16am: And he's down. I get on the computer for a few minutes and begin writing this blog post.

10:35am: He's been moaning a little bit and talking to himself. Now he's actually asleep.

10:47am: I'm done with the computer. I briefly contemplate getting back in bed for a nap (which I should probably be embarrassed to admit I do once a week or so during his morning nap), but the coffee has kicked in and the fact that I'm documenting my day suddenly makes me want to be extra productive. I make the bed; throw in a load of laundry; sweep the kitchen, laundry room, dining room, and living room; and wet Swiffer the kitchen. I find a dead (small) roach while sweeping under the stove and am happy Nicholas' little fingers can't reach that far. We don't see them often, but we live in Texas in house built in the 1920s. Roaches are bound to appear once in a while.

11:18am: I hop into the shower. We're meeting my friend Shannon for lunch at noon, so I need to be quick. I don't have time to wash my hair, so I go for a quick rinse and then break out the dry shampoo. I figure as a soon-to-be working mom, I better get used to streamlining my beauty routine (even more than it already is.) Also, I figure maybe the fact that I haven't invested in a full wash and blow dry will serve as an incentive to squeeze in a workout later in the afternoon.

11:35am: Shoot. I am running behind schedule. I used to be a very punctual person. Then I had a baby. Now I am 10 minutes late wherever I go. I text Shannon to let her know. I run around trying to get the diaper bag ready and realize we have no clean bottles, so I quickly wash out a few, fill one with water, and throw a to-go formula pouch into the diaper bag.

11:45am: I have to wake Nicholas up from his nap. I hate doing this, but fortunately he wakes up easily. I change him, dress him, and strap him into the carseat. But not before we take a quick photo on the way out the door. I am wearing my snazzy new mustard yellow skinny cords. I know you want to see my yellow cords.

I so have a dazzling career in fashion blogging ahead of me, right? Right?

12:08pm: We arrive at Whole Foods. Shannon has scored us a table, so I drop off Nicholas and go forage lunch for myself. I wind up with spicy tuna rolls with brown rice and a side of steamed veggies on top of Asian style noodles. I eat and then feed Nicholas his bottle. We catch up about her recent trip to Seattle, the new house, and my new job.

1:06pm: Behind schedule again. Lunch was too short, and now we're late to Gymboree. Fortunately traffic is light and we make good time up MoPac.

1:20pm: We arrive at Gymboree only 5 minutes late, just as parent sharing time is starting. This week's topic: solid foods. Nicholas plays happily with some bells and other noise makers while I chat with another mom.

After class, we exchange contact info. She lives near our new neighborhood and we make plans to get together once we move in. I may have just made a new mom friend.

2:18pm: We head home. Nicholas is past due for his afternoon nap, so I sing about 7 verses of "Old MacDonald Had a Farm" on the way home while craning my arm back into his carseat to keep him awake until we reach our house.

2:30pm: Success. We arrive and he's still awake. We head in and just a few minutes later Daddy surprises us by arriving to work from home for the afternoon. He helps to change Nicholas and we catch up for a few minutes.

2:49pm: Now Nicholas is way overdue for a nap. We skip story time and instead just say bye bye to the outside. Then I close the blinds, nurse him, rock him, and put him down in his crib.

3:03pm: He is out like a light.

3:10pm: Last night's middle of the night feeding combined with the cold I've been fighting all week prove to be too powerful a combination and I give in to the siren call of a nap.

3:45pm: Aaaaaand we're up again. How I dream of waking up from a full night's sleep or a nap of my own accord, and not due to fussing or wailing sounds from the baby monitor.

3:48pm: I go get Nicholas and take him out to bounce in his Sassy Seat. I grab a quick snack, move the wet laundry into the dryer, and open up my computer to answer a few emails and complete an online request for a moving quote.

4:25pm: Jason is taking a break from work. I show him some videos I've found of Nicholas when he was just days old. Nicholas watches with us with a very concerned and perplexed look on his face when he hears  his newborn self crying and hears my voice say his name on the video.

4:40pm: Nicholas and I head out for a walk around the neighborhood. It's close to 90 and humid, but even this is a marked improvement from just a few weeks ago when an afternoon walk would have been an impossibility. We stop at the park for 10 minutes to play on the swings-- his new favorite activity-- and then we continue on our way.

All that hard work just wipes him out!

5:45pm: We arrive home. It's dinnertime for Mr. Nicholas. Tonight's menu includes half a jar of vegetable pasta puree, followed by a full jar of banana strawberry puree. His appetite is growing by the day.

6:00pm: I hop in the shower again while Daddy finishes feeding Nicholas.

6:20pm: Bath time! I fill up the tub and set out all the supplies, and then Jason bathes Nicholas while I go finish drying my hair. We are meeting friends for dinner, so I put back on the snazzy yellow cords (otherwise I would just rinse off, leave my hair wet, and throw on some sweats.)

6:35pm: Nicholas is all fresh and sweet smelling in clean PJs. The idea is that we'll get him all ready for bed, and then hopefully he'll eventually fall asleep at the restaurant in his carseat carrier. I nurse him. Unfortunately his tummy is too full from all the banana strawberry puree and he throws up all over himself (and me.) I wipe myself off, but he requires an outfit change.

6:50pm: Finally, we're out the door!

7:00pm: We arrive at Drink.well, Austin's latest hipster gastropub. I'm not clear on whether it's technically a bar or a restaurant, but we bring Nicholas in and no one seems to mind. Fortunately, we find a quiet table in the corner.

7:08pm: Pete and Jarren arrive. We haven't seen them in months, so it's fun to catch up over an adult beverage and some tasty food. Both Jarren and I go with the ZLT (zuchini lettuce tomato, with homemade chips), the guys opt for the Kobe burger, and both couples get the homemade apple pie Twinkie. Our entrees are tasty, but we all agree the Twinkie is a disappointment. It's more like a Twinkie shaped apple muffin and there's not even any filling inside. Lame. But, Nicholas is on good behavior. We feed him a bottle, and eventually he  falls asleep as hoped. We order another round.

9:15pm: The evening comes to a close and we say our goodbyes and then head home. We change Nicholas, give him some preemptive baby Advil, and I nurse him again and then put him in his crib and say goodnight. He's asleep before I shut his door.

9:49pm: I sit down with my laptop to type out this post while Jason fires up his video games.

10:36pm: It turns out that documenting my day results in the longest post ever. Kudos if you've made it this far. I'm impressed. I finally wrap up this post and then surf Facebook and some other blogs for 10 minutes while I pump.

10:50pm: I head into the bathroom to get ready for bed. I always tell myself I'm going to go to bed by 10pm, but it never happens.

11:06pm: Lights out. It's been a fun, full day, and I am wiped out. Good night!

You Know You're a Mom When... (Birthday Edition)

This past weekend, I turned another year older. I had a few fun plans with friends, and my two boys did a great job making my day special, but I was struck by how (much like everything else) birthdays are a little different once you have a baby. You know you are a mom when . . .

 . . . You begin your birthday (which happens to fall on a Sunday) not with a lazy morning of sleeping in, a leisurely brunch, or even a hot cup of coffee and a piece of toast. Nope. You begin your birthday with an 8:30am trip to the grocery store. But you're actually excited about it because it's a solo (!) trip and it's been so long that you've been to the grocery store alone that it might as well just be an hour long hot stone massage. It's that indulgent. It's also thrilling to get such a necessary chore knocked out early in the morning before the crowds hit. Birthday perks galore.

. . . Your birthday wish list is a little different this year. Don't get me wrong. I wouldn't turn down jewelry, flowers, designer shoes, or a fancy meal out. But what I really, really want? A nap. Maybe an hour alone to flip through the pages of a magazine . . . or just stare out the window. A good glass of wine. And, oh yes, another nap. I'm easy to please these days.

. . . Your little man is teething and decides that, nope, he is simply not going to nap whatsoever on your birthday and you realize that even cranky, tired snuggles from your seven month old are a pretty good gift.

(And the antics of a cranky, non-napping seven month old are made infinitely more tolerable when your husband bakes you chocolate layer cake with chocolate butter cream frosting from scratch for your birthday dessert. Amazing and delicious.)

On Breastfeeding

I have something to admit and it's pretty terrible. It's shameful and obnoxious, but it's the truth. So here it is:

I used to judge women who didn't breastfeed their babies.

This was, of course, before I actually became a mother myself. I realize there are dozens of reasons to feed a baby formula, medical or otherwise, and I didn't indiscriminately judge formula feeders across the board. I recognized that there are many very valid reasons to forgo breastfeeding in favor of formula, so it was just the women who chose formula, but who could otherwise breastfed, that I judged. I thought, so it's a little painful? Eh, toughen up. Or, it's inconvenient? Really? You're going to put your own needs ahead of what the medical community says is best for your baby? Maybe it's time to re-prioritize.

This was, as I mentioned, before I ever tried breastfeeding for myself.

I had always assumed that naturally I would breastfeed my children. Would I go the full 12 months recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics? Maybe, maybe not. But I would definitely give it a good go. Nine, ten months at least. And it would come totally naturally to me and I would love doing it. Obviously.

And then Nicholas was born. The first few days weren't so bad. He had a good latch and we both seemed to be catching on pretty well. But several days in, things changed. I discovered that breastfeeding, for me at least, felt like 12,000 burning knives stabbing my nipples. Breastfeeding, as it turned out, was more difficult and painful for me than pregnancy, labor, and delivery combined -- times ten. And, suddenly, I was battling the urge to throw in the towel and pop open that free sample of formula buried in the back of his closet on an hourly basis.

I made deals with myself daily-- just get through today. Just make it to the end of the week. And, the golden beacon in the distance, when the pain would be gone: just make it to two months. On the one had, two months seemed pretty reasonable. A drop in the bucket of my lifetime. But, the reality is that babies eat 10-12 times per day, and there was just barely enough time in between feedings for the burning, throbbing sensation in my nipples to fade. I cried. I cried often. I cried from the pain, I cried in frustration, and I cried out of dread for the next feeding looming on my schedule.

But, as the books promised, the pain did begin to fade gradually. It went from excruciating, to really painful, to pretty uncomfortable over time. And around five weeks, I noticed that while the 12,000 burning knives sensation was gone, my son would feed for hours at a time-- and scream inconsolably whenever I tried to get up off the couch and do something, anything, else. After one marathon three hour feeding session, I finally decided to go see a lactation consultant.

She was so helpful, and I'm very glad I went. She examined Nicholas, weighed him with and without a diaper, watched closely as I fed him from both sides, and then weighed him again. Her conclusion was that I simply wasn't producing enough milk. Not by a long shot. He was underweight and it was only my stubbornness diligence about breastfeeding him on demand, for hours a day, that had kept him from becoming seriously underweight. She put me on a milk-making regime, but it was time to begin supplementing with formula. And I was more than fine with that.

Months have passed and Nicholas is now a healthy, chubby-cheeked, squishy baby. He's got delicious little rolls on his thighs, and a crease all the way around both wrists where his baby fat meets his plump little hands. I am still breastfeeding him about 90% of the time, but he gets a few bottles of formula a week. The pain is long gone, and I do appreciate the fact that I can feed him without a lot of fanfare around washing and sterilizing bottles or the expense of buying can after can of formula. But I still think about weaning him. He will be six months in just over a week-- a fact which astonishes me-- and sometimes I feel like I've put in enough of the good fight. I still struggle to produce enough milk, so I'm constantly monitoring my protein and fluid intake while supplementing with a witch's brew of herbs. On days when I'm just not making enough milk, he gets fussy and we both get frustrated. He's an active little guy, and most of our feeding sessions these days entail him pummeling me with his fists and feet while he eats. He's also still waking up several times a night and usually the only thing that can lull him back to sleep is my breast. Then there are those occasions when we're out in public and it would just be so nice to pull out a pre-prepared bottle rather than wrangle his kicking and writhing body under a nursing cover. And sometimes I just wish my body was my own again. Breastfeeding my son has turned out to be far more challenging than I ever expected.

But then there are moments like this evening, during a mid-summer thunder storm, when I nursed my son to sleep in a quiet, dim room while the rain cascaded off the eaves outside his window. His body heavy and warm in my arms. His breathing quiet and peaceful as he drifted off. That rosebud mouth and those soft little arms nuzzled up against me. These are the moments I want to remember. When I realize I'm in no rush to shed the vestiges of his babyhood. When I think, I could do this a little longer. And so I will. With proper appreciation for what my body requires to sustain a growing baby, with gratefulness to science and industry for creating a nutritious alternative or supplement to a mother's milk, and with respect for all women and their choices in how to nourish their babies.

Mmmmm... Carrots

Nicholas started on solids a few weeks ago. So far, we've only given him rice cereal, but I decided to try my hand at homemade baby food today. First up: carrots.



It may be a little while until we convert him into a foodie...

Naptime S.O.S.

I'm looking for some advice from my fellow moms out there. Nicholas has become a fantastic nighttime sleeper, going to bed around 7-8pm and sleeping for anywhere from 7-10 hours before waking up to eat. For a three month old, I realize that is pretty stellar. However, he is a terrible napper. He'll take 2-3 naps during the day, but they are never longer than about 45 minutes. Some are as short as 30 minutes. Often, he'll wake up screaming from his naps, and I can tell he's just exhausted and should be sleeping, but he fights it and rarely goes back to sleep. Based on the baby books, it sounds like he should be taking two 1.5-2 hour naps a day. I've read a little bit about the "45 minute intruder," which basically talks about how babies' sleep cycles are about 45 minutes during naps, and they often wake up in between cycles when they should continue to sleep for another 45 minutes or so.

Has anyone else experienced this? Any tips or advice on how to give the "45 minute intruder" the boot? My little guy is dying for some better quality daytime sleep... and Mommy is dying for some time to get things done around the house... or shower... or eat. You get the picture.

Help!